Well, here you are. The secret, unlinked page on my site. Here are my original Haiku, posted by popular demand.


Big Chocolate Rabbit
I think Iíve got a habit
Burnt marshmallow Peep
I told you once slut
Chex-mix ainít gonna cut it
Bring on the sirloin
Play that Alpine horn
Like you were Miles Davis
Reeeeeeecola, Reeeeeco. . . .
Muzak undertones
My butt-plug needs to be cleaned
Iíll sue your ass off
Nachos Belgrande
Has laid waste to my colon
My catís still in heat
Figure-four leg lock
Lowenbrau cut with urine
You want cheese on that?
On the Dumbo ride
Smith and Wesson to your head
What could be better?
The Marquis de Sade
Crammed produce up his asshole
Have you seen Braveheart?
Mold on the cheddar
But thereís nothing else to eat
Kick her in the cunt.
Sink full of dishes
Apartment wreaks of urine
Marry you? Yeah. . .right.
Cyber porn invite
This chat room shit is a waste
Click here for nude teens
Chimney Rock, N.C.
Down home cookiní, hush puppies
Squeal like a pig, boy!!
Tired. . .so tired.
You canít wait to get home to
Dinty Moore Beef Stew
Maybe if you would
Work some of that ass off, youíd
Get laid more often
White washed garage side
Three thousand dollar boob job
Halloween. . .nut flush
All the ass he wants
Freed from years of slavery
Howardís wife dumped him
Check the tits on him!
What is this, slap Boris day?
Never mind that shit.
Pee on you? What for??
Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!
Can't I just go home?
Even Mike D knows
I'd paint three of those murals
For some of that ass.
Train out of New York
It never grows old to me
City to suburb.
Sitting side by side
Hispanics practically scream
Why are they so loud?